Thursday, January 14, 2016

Rovod Gusilamem and his fate


    Rovod Gusilamem was a proud, bald ale drinker with long brown beard and always dirty face. He was fifty-nine years old dwarf with lousy intellect born of the 2nd of Sandstone in the year 192. Annoyed by rain. He was tall and fat. He had an ability to focus on ale. It made him clumsy and very quick to fire. His motto: "For the booze and industry!"
    Rovod looked at the Clumsy Axe in his hands and felt fat. He walked over to the anvil and reflected on his dirty sounds. Rovod always hated his home - the hopeless Adil Esdor with its cruel, but brave existing. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel fat.
    Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the shapeless figure of Kadol Rovodnanir. Kadol was a mean stupid woman with hairy ass and broad elbows.
    Rovod gulped and closed the door immediately. Once, Rovod had defeated a giant toad from the Swamps Of Hell. But not even a proud person who had once defeated giant toad was prepared for what Kadol had in the pockets today.
    The wind blew like an old dog with enormous stomach, making Rovod sad.
    As Rovod finally stepped outside his cave and Kadol came closer, he could see the little glint in her eye. "I am here because I want peace," Kadol bellowed, in a tactless tone. Rovod grabbed her hair and pulled inside the cave, then he slammed her head against anvil, with the force of 2376 trolls. "I frigging hate you, Kadol." Rovod was drunk.
    After this he looked back and fell, - even more drunk he became, - and picked up the Clumsy Axe. "Kadol, I just don't need you in my life anymore," he said.
    They looked at each other with drunk feelings. They remembered that fire accident, the folk music playing in the background and two dumb uncles fighting.
    Rovod studied Kadol's hairy face and elbows. Eventually, he took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, but I can't give you peace," he explained, in pitying tone.
    Kadol looked bad, her body was like an old ale barrel. Rovod could actually cut Kadol's body into 2361 pieces. But he couldn't.
    Not even a drink of ale would calm Rovod's nerves tonight.